Clearly we have all been there, made a list, a resolution, be it for your birthday, summer, or new years. I've tried my whole life to wait until Monday to start a new habit, or the 1st of the month. Shoot, why not wait till New Years to start a new habit.
For more than 11 years now, I have been waiting, and putting off losing weight. At the drop of a hat, I revert back to my old ways, and seem to practically welcome any thing that comes across my way, as an excuse to not finish. Truth be told, I think that without fail, every time I try to start, I get sick, or my kids fall sick, which is the perfect excuse to not work out, and pig out, right. Yeay I knew you would understand.
If you read my blog, you will know that my problem is not really eating unhealthy. I have never been into junk food, processed food, soda, candy, fast food, etc. My kids also have not had access to these lovely things either. My poor husband has also come to terms with my obsession, so then how is it that I just can't get rid of this weight. Well my dear friends, eating healthy just isn't enough, when you love food as much as I do, lol. I mean really LOVE food, like I cherish food, and seriously love cooking, and feeding people till they roll over. It's the Romanian in me, I can't help it. Unless you take like 3rds and 4ths, I don't believe you've enjoyed the meal, and I get really sad. So with the same mentality if i go anywhere, I must eat like 3 or 4 servings, constantly telling the chef how fabulous the food is, which I 99% of the time really mean. So eating alot is no problem for me.
Along with the fact I hate cardio, thats just not a winning combination for losing weight. What do I mean by cardio, well anything that makes me sweat, and makes me hurt. If I run for like 30 seconds, my boobs get sore, from bouncing, my side, lungs, heart, and knee hurts. Why would I do that, hello. No I don't have double d's, just regular saggy boobs from all the years of breastfeeding. Then I start to pant, gasping for air, and my entire face is red as a cherry, and I am sweating so profusely it's pouring down. Hardly what I want to go through, and all this after only 30 seconds. lol. Pretty sad, I tell you.
Now you are probably wondering just how much weight are we talking here. Sounds like I have a ton to lose. Let me be honest with you, I could care less about the weight. I'm not concerned with the number on the scale, or the size dress I wear. What I do care about is the fact that I can't run a mile, that I get so out of breath. That my thighs rub together when I walk. That I don't feel comforatble in a bathing suit. That I can't swim across a pool without feeling like Im going to drown. My poor body should be stronger than this. I should be at the peak of my life, not aching when I get up of the floor, or having severe back pain, as a direct result of my HATE for anything sit up related as well. Yeay, for sure the part of my body I need to work at the most. Everything else will be a piece of cake, lol, just that tummy, short of cutting it off, I simply can not fathom how it will ever look normal. Without that tummy hanging over my panties, ya know what I'm talking about ladies. Oh don't forget about the wings in the back, under the bra, and of course we don't want to leave out those lovely handles. Who ever came up with the name love handles, is crazy, because there is nothing I love about mine. They should be called hate handles, def more approptiate.
Hope I'm not losing anyone here, I've been doing tons of rambling, and sharing all the reasons, why until now I have been unsuccessful.
Let me give you guys a glimpse of home, and let you know there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Once upon a time I actually used to love working out with weights. Have always hated cardio. Never stepped foot in a class at the gym. Then recent;y discovered I really LOVE the gym classes. I got into yoga, and shocked myself at how quickly I progressed. Pretty cool stuff. Took some cardio like classes, and was a mess during and after, but stuck with it, and I survived, enough to actually look forward to going again. So much so that, I enrolled YET again with a gym, (have been a member or some gym, for practically the past 15 years) no joke. As a matter of fact, guess what. I am so cool, that I actually have 2 gym memberships right now. Yeah, I had to get another one to a Life Time Fitness, because well they have a pool, and rock wall, and basketball, yadda yadda, which I of course hardly ever go to. My other gym is Golds, which I do go to more often, as it's right by my house.
So what's the point here, you are still asking. Ok I'll tell you. 3 days ago, I started a 12 week challenge which I conveniently waited, you see, to coordinate in my mind the perfect timeline. 100 day challenge, yeah but heavans, I have to do a 12 week program, and hmmm, I want to finish on new years eve, so oh I have to start on October 10 for this to happen. Great I just bought myself almost 2 more weeks of chillin, lol. I know crazy but true. Ok so anyhow, 3 days ago, officially I have started my program. For the gazzilionth time, and my hopes are high. This whole blogging thing, is great motivation, I tell you. No matter what, I have done things in the past 2 months, more quickly because I knew I had to follow up on my blog about it, especially when I go open my big mouth like I'm doing now. Then after it's posted, I don't want to make a fool of myself by not following thru so, therefor I make it happen.
Oh please lord, let this be just like that. I have tried to do this challenge so many times, has it always been for the wrong reasons? Am I doing it now for the wrong reasons? I don't know, and really at this point don't care. I just want to get it done already. Don't laugh, but it would be a dream come true to be on the cover of Shape magazine or something. Me someone who NEVER had a one pack, let alone a six pack, me who can hardly go get the mail, without huffing and puffing, me who has not been able to get rid of my baby pouch for over 11 years. Yeay, me. Ok so I may never be on the cover of any magazine, but hey, a girl can dream right. Shoot, at this point, the only thing that matters, is showing you all I can do it, and in the end, I will have shown myself. Nothing can beat the feeling of finishing something you started, and for me this has been one heck of a long time coming.
Wish me luck guys, I have a long way to go, but with only 80 days to go, I think I can, I think I can. I know I can, I WILL.
I will update with the program that got me started on this whole 12 week thing, next time, and if you can possibly stand to see some before pictures, I will post them. I took them as part of the process, and every time I look at them, I cringe, however I REALLY believe that as long as they are hidden in the drawer, where nobody can see, it is useless. I took those pics to motivate me, and I hide them, out of sight, out of mind, you know. Once I show you guys, it's all over. The cat is out of the bag, and there will be no turning back.
Sounds, kinda scary, so let me sleep on it. Till next time, just know that, I have been at the gym 3 times, this week, doing nothing other than CARDIO. Treadmill, and I kinda watched what I ate, but more on that later. Rocky start, with the kiddos, trying to come down with a cold, also, and my house is still a mess, and planning a party, and well you know, life.
Thanks guys for reading how I feel, and please let me know if you have any of these problems, how you overcame them, and if you have any advice for me.
Pictures, menu, and wourkout schedule to come soon, keep your eye out, and follow me along on one of the most important BEFORE and AFTER's I will do.
As always ENJOY!
Special requests, or mad love always welcome:)